I've been getting silly on the internet, showing my face everywhere. I've sung songs with my chickens, danced barefoot in my closet, shared my garden, read a couple of my poems, once in a princess dress, and, basically, put my face out into the world. Welcome to my life. Enter the mind of an author who's a little bit eccentric. They say it runs in my family and I have to agree.
There was a time when I was shy and quiet. For those who met me in the last ten years, it will be hard to believe but you'll have to trust me that it's true. Going to a party was one of my worst nightmares. Now I get shushed for being too loud at a gathering even if I'm not drinking any alcohol. I can get "drunk" on water. I think I get drunk on life and the joys it has given me. Why not? Life should be about joy, about living, about getting the most out of every single moment. Too many times we yearn to be back in our childhood bodies once again and do silly things. We yearn to get mud on our feet and eat too many cookies. We yearn to be unselfconscious about how we look. We yearn to be our happiest self. But, being an adult has its' constrictions, rules and regulations. I'm 54 and I find myself caring less and less about how I look to others, how I present myself to the world at large. I'm less concerned about following society's conventions of what a middle aged woman should do, how she should look, what she should say. I quit wearing makeup, quit coloring my hair, quit shaving my legs....yes you heard me right. I quit shaving my legs. I quit plucking my eyebrows. I started wearing clothing that makes me happy in the moment I'm in. If that means I wear a long gown to a dinner party then so be it. If I want to set a fancy table complete with flowers, candles and a handwritten menu I'm going to do it. No harm done.
Sometimes I sing to my chickens and sometimes I sing to myself. I sing off key and out of tune but I still sing. Sometimes I dance in my kitchen while I'm baking cookies to take to the neighbor's house and I'm barefoot while I do it. It brings me joy. If another person, another human happens to come upon me being silly and, yes, a bit eccentric, I welcome them to join in. Or at least soak up a bit of the joy I hope I'm leaking out into the world around me.
In this new world of social media where I'm trying to navigate as a new born author I'm putting my face out there, getting seen, as myself, in my own skin. Here I am. Here is my world. Welcome in.
